Here’s why I think CALLS are better for these things and also why I use calls on any number I cop and also why I will always tell a girl “I will call you later this week” or text her something like that.
Especially if you’re coping a number from a quick interaction (and I’m thinking this also applies to online but I don’t do that so wouldn’t know) she needs to INVEST in you for her to want to come out.
Otherwise it’s just another number and even if she’s interested if she’s in high demand socially, her friends, work, other dudes, the latest episode off Netflix, and just about anything else is going to be more important than the guy she hasn’t met who is a social UNKNOWN.
So when I do get digits I will tell her to EXPECT a call, which is a bridge from when we first hit off and some future time that builds anticipation.
Then I will CALL her when I have down time. Answering a CALL is a lot more investment on her part than answering a text. It’s an UNDEFINED amount of time, she has to think on her feet, it’s way more emotionally stimulating than a text, etc. etc.
That’s when I will also probe her schedule and figure out when is a good time to put her in my schedule. That can all happen over the phone in about 5 minutes, and I can actually feel her out and figure out where she is in the buying process.
So now that you’ve talked on the phone and actually set a general time she is more invested in meeting up (she spent time on the phone, you were funny and good personality so now she’s curious, you got her schedule and figured out a time that works for her and you, etc.).
For girls that don’t answer, I leave a quick message and tell them to hit me back. Her calling me back is once again an INVESTMENT as she’s got to take time and do all that. A girl that doesn’t bother to CALL you back is the same girl that will text you back and then flake.
Girls that are responsive to CALLS and I can tell are more interested in kicking it get more priority to REWARD their interest. Just like she’s rewarded by an interesting convo when she answers my call.
I also don’t care about getting a girl on the phone a few times before I get her out. If she is busy that week or the times she’s throwing out don’t work for me I will let her know that I’m busy but I will CALL her again later on next week (cue cycle of anticipation and further investment).
Once we’ve got a time set, I will tell her that I will hit her up later to let her know that it is still on.
Another subtle thing is that I don’t put any of the pressure on her to meet up. I find out when she is free, I suggest a time that works, all she has to do is say yes. I’m pacing the whole thing and I take the ground of confirming and setting up a good experience that works with where I will be that day and what I want to do. Then I will let her know later on the day of that I am running late or whatever to confirm that she is still down.
If a girl is super responsive and in to me then I may text her if I’ve got some time to think about it. But if a date is set then I will usually just wait to rap at her IN PERSON and just text to confirm or send her directions.
If I’m just trying to get a girl out, then I will tell her tag along to whatever I’m doing that day. Since that’s just an offer, it’s no big deal if she doesn’t show or has other stuff to do and I don’t get angry if they don’t show.
I just CALL them later and set something up if I want to see her for real.