Caesar is Black

Dope Game in the Dope Game

Category: Dope (Page 1 of 4)

Pushing Buttons

Emotional stimulation and navigating a girl’s mental blocks came up on another thread.

Until you get the basic idea and can run stuff unscripted, it may help to have some kind of basic gambit down and follows up. Run it a few times and then you’ll get the hang and then you should stop running canned shit cause it will put you in a rut.

The idea is to conjure emotions and feels in a chick and then get her to relate with the positive ones to you and any negative ones to other things.

You want to come up with one for yourself but I almost always play off location and travel cause it’s central to my life and I usually lead with a related curiosity gambit that gets her to ask where I’m from and why I’m here (did this even in the states)

Then it’s like

“You ever get ready to do something new and then just before you’re mad excited but also like a little nervous, that’s always my favorite feeing because the nervous energy is like a little sign that you are about to step outside your comfort zone and then it’s like yo you really need to do this. That’s how I feel about traveling and going to new places and meeting new people. I know it’s always going to be an amazing experience if i just step outside that comfort zone.”

Etc etc

Knowing some NLP type stuff and how to use language to get to feelings and how to anchor these to yourself and how to emphasize some words with embedded commands. Ya all helpful but not really required if you get the basic idea.

Then you want to get her to draw out the same vibe in herself so she matches it. Usually will do this by turning that whole sequence above back on her with cold read.

“Yeah I bet you know how that is you seem like an adventurous type / love adventure / try new things often / etc”

Then she agrees and talks about it some and you probe her (what they call eliciting values) a bit with some questions or open ended statements.

For getting around hangups it’s mostly about having some empathy and being able to see where she is struggling a bit because she wants the cool guy experience and to be swept up in that feel but sometimes she needs some help getting there.

Disregarding logistics and other meat space stuff to just talk about mental things. A lot of it is social frame stuff cause she needs to know that you won’t judge her, won’t put her in a bad situation, that she won’t have blow back to her circle and that you won’t be some clingy looser once she gives it up.

So yeah once you realize where she is at you can work with her to get past those together. And usually it helps to throw in some non judgement frame where you can talk about how guys are always judging chicks and it makes it hard for girls to open up and yeah you think it’s wack.

There’s way better info about this stuff elsewhere once you know where to look and a lot of it is low key overkill at a certain point but yeah it is fun to run.

Systems

End Game type things is that you want minimal work maximum output. In biz, you own a bit of this in that, spin up a few things here and there, then set people to work for X-Y% of whatever you can sell the end product for. You scale it by throwing more people or giving them some tools to improve output.

War Machine - Cash Rules Everything Around Me

C.R.E.A.M.

If I’m running biz stuff, CASH is the ultimate End Game with some Virtue thrown in for good measure. When it comes to Seducing Mad Fly Chicks, the system needs to switch up a bit cause the end goal isn’t so focused.

Mostly that’s cause guys don’t know what they want and even if they’ve got a vague idea like “get more” or “get better” or “get The One,” they haven’t refined the specifics enough to put something in place.

Let’s say though that you did get some Whys in your head and you want the basics. Access, so you can go where you want. Choice, so you can pick whom you want. Flexibility, so you can do all of this whenever you want.

The questions then becomes… How?

You should always work on some basic happiness factor stuff first. Get your Money right. Do whatever you need to do for fitness, diet, style stuff so that you don’t look like a slob. If you’re not sure if you look like a slob, then you look like a slob.

Looks, Money, Style jazz is all easy shit. The important piece is to start today cause it all compounds. Stack your paper bit by bit. Hit some reps on the regular and grab Fits when you find a good deal.

That is all part of Coming Correct.

From there, it is all about the day to day.

Set yourself up for social situations and get your work in.

That means

Morning commute and routine puts me around people. Mass Transit, morning Espresso, or Gym. Preferably all three. Default state is to Mingle and chat people up. Friendly, morning chat brightens people’s day and gets them off on a good foot. They deserve it, I deserve it.

Mid-day I spend making Calls, Closing or Taking Names. I might make a house call or two. Grab lunch and it’s the same thing as Morning Routine shit. Get around people, chat, eat, preferably with Company.

More Cash moves in the mid-afternoon, though I picked up a habit of throwing in a Siesta when I was staying in Barcelona. I close out the day strong. This is usually when I start throwing a few back and making some follow up Calls.

If there are events on the Docket then I’ll hit those in the late evening. Otherwise, it’s a stop by the local lounge for another 12-year or three, then dinner, in or out depending on the mood.

That all seems simple enough but the devil is in the details.

I’m always throwing out Bait and working for a Hook, especially if there is a Fly Girl that I run across during the course of the day. The point is to regularly flex the social muscle with some sparring and then you are always ready for a Main Event.

If I get a Hook, then I’ll figure out logistics and a plan. Typically because I’m busy in situations it means crunching a number and setting up some kind of plan for Later.

The Plan is always dependent on my schedule and what is going to make the most sense for me. I’m never ditching checks for a girl, but I will work her in to a before or after scenario if it makes sense. Otherwise she gets a convenient time slot, usually dinner or drinks, but occasionally it’s Lunch or Breakfast. But if in the Moment, I’ve got time and she does too then we can always keep things flowing.

Also I don’t discriminate much between biz and social, switching it up based on the best context and what is going to work well for me. I’ve passed on Mad Fly Girls to get a check from them instead. What that means is that in an average week I’m running a couple hundred social interactions. Those funnel down in to biz deals, time to kick it with chicks, and a growing social circle.

Over time the idea is to increase the share of these interactions so that it is mostly Fly Girls. I’ve also added more of the social circle component in as time goes on. When I first started this stuff it was mostly running 1 on 1s with chicks, not going after deals or groups, but I’ve been finding better opportunities by going 1 or 2 jumps deep in to a network instead of just picking off the first one I run across.

From there I optimize and tweak for results. Usually that means throwing in a few experiments on the regular and hitting new places on the map.

The Pros of this kind of approach is that I can spin up a good party or social situation with Fly chicks on most any day of the week with minimal lead time. To stay booked I usually look a week or so in advance, but there is always Free Time to take advantage of Serendipitous Encounters. So far I haven’t found a Con to this approach except for the one connect I made that is running a Monte ring.

Get out there.

Free Dive

If I told you that you could have the depth and connection that you wanted with your definition of a FLY chick, and she were to give you all the emotional and physical fulfillment that you desire, and you could get all of that by spending a few hours with her that passed with ease, you would jump at the chance.

If the thought of that makes you excited then you probably should look to understand Game.

Best illustrated with an example.

Wake up at 3pm and it’s Sunday and shinning and I’m piecing together the strings of last night from the empty bottles and roaches that are all around my flat.

As best you can recall it had involved lots of Whiskey at an after party spot in the Valley where I had run in to the definition of cool and sexy and silky smooth vixen sista who was speaking other languages in my ear and enjoying me until the early morning.

Now she was just a Vision and I headed out to grab food. I hit the local corner spot, dap up the Older Gs that are posted, and grab a breakfast sandwich. Throw down with the cats and Spit Game as per usual before rolling off back towards the spot.

Then I see Another Vision.

This girl, different from the first, but still exactly the Type. Seated, bench, kicking it on her phone.

Funny how life will throw you a good roll like that.

So of course I go talk to her.

Circle back, sit down. Check my phone. She looks over. I turn, say hi, tell her to take off her headphones.

But she’s too much energy full in the face and my usual stuff just goes out the window so I just Go Direct.

She’s flattered. There’s an accent. I grab on that. Of course it is French. And She’s French African. I break out a bit. But slowly, letting her pick up the pieces.

The questions start coming.

“How do you speak so well?”

Vague answers. She asks some more. I throw her a few bones. She’s fully in to this now.

“Why did you come talk to me?”

“Who are you what are you doing here?”

It goes on like that for a while.

I tell her I want to take her out. Tonight. I’ve got to leave the next day for business. We exchange numbers.

She asks if it’s a date and I tell her we are just hanging out. “No pressure”

She doesn’t like dates. She just had a bad one the other day. Guy was a terrible kisser.

This is a wide open shot and I’ve been hitting from range all day.

“I hate when that happens, but are you even a good kisser.”

She looks at me funny. We’re pretty close at that point. She opens up and I reward her for it. Pull back early. “You’re decent.” She goes for some more. Pull back again.

Then she is a bit amazed that it even happened. She says as much. And she bolts. She’s drops a “nice to meet you” and dips.

Things were going so well too.

I’ve got her number though. And when I get back to my spot I’ve got a text from the First Vision From Last Night. We circle around making plans. It gets later.

So I Call the girl from the bench. No answer, message, “yo it’s me from earlier, I’m still trying to take you out, hit me back if you get this and we’ll get dinner.”

I think it’s pretty Cold at that point.

The homies come through to blaze up and kick it while I’m in town.

Then my line goes off. She’s calling me back.

I answer. Of course the bros are trying to throw me off but I’m Smooth and Collected. Always.

She can’t believe we kissed earlier. She wants to go out. I tell her that we’ll do dinner at 8. She says we will meet at the bench. “Where we kissed.”

It is on.

Time comes around. I throw back some 12 year and post. She calls again. She’s at the park. I roll down and of course everything is straight edge. I am the picture of fly and she is as well.

She was fly before, but now it’s dress out, hair down, and it is Extra Fly now.

I’m low key playing it conservative and go for the double cheek kiss. But she goes in for more and that’s pretty much that.

Dinner is for us to enjoy. The spot is nice. The atmosphere is double nice. The owner is comping me a bottle just because he understands how Fly this girl is and how we are delving in the Night.

Topics range as the Conversation and the Wine flows freely. Three courses later and we are both full but light at the same time. The sign of a good meal. We walk back to the spot.

Upstairs things escalate quickly. She was Extra Fly with the dress but with out it she is the Most Fly.

Later after we are both worn out, she lays on me and we talk about life and love and the connections that once strangers can make.

“I just met you today but I feel like you know me so well.”

The Easiest Groups

I’ve been running way more mixed groups by opening a guy in the group first.

Especially if it’s more girls than guys in the group.

Because it’s cake.

The dude either…

A) Intros you to the group

You’re in. Social proof by intro to the group. Run standard stuff from there.

B) Pawns off a girl on to you.

A lot of guys will intro you to a single girl in the group because they don’t want you to meet the girl they’re after and it’s easier to pawn sacrifice the 3rd wheel in the group. Either that’s the girl you were after or just stick around and talk to her until she intros you to the others or they get curious and jump in the convo. Gay guys do this a lot and often will set you up with the girl in the group that is most down.

C) Try and get rid of you.

If you just ramble a bit eventually the girls will get curious and either open you or make it easy to pull you in to the convo.

Clockwork.

Guys that are protective of their group end up trying to keep you out by keeping you talking but the girls thinking just end up thinking “who is this guy?”

OR

They are friendly dudes and will try and set you up with a girl in their group because the dude is trying to get some from her home girl.

So many easy buckets to be had off assists.

Bar Class

Throwing up some reps recently and getting dialed in on some easy ways to work a bar.

Picture. Low-key spot, few people milling around, not much music.

Post up at the bar. Chat the bar staff. Get some energy going. Keep the bar tender around you, and anyone else coming up for a drink is going to need to come in next door. Chop it up a bit off any random thing, and then you can move on to the next as it suits you.

Medium-level-busy spot and you’ve got some options. Posting up is still a good move. Just get somewhere in the middle of the bar, or off a corner. You want people to be cycling by as they get their drinks and bounce out. Always stay talking. You want your section to be jumping with you as the center of things (not necessarily the center of attention, just the center of the action). Bonus to leave some basic space for people to come grab a drink. This kind of situation will get you a bunch of new people to talk to and you can add to your little group when someone is chill enough to warrant it.

Super-packed spot with the music blasting out, just move down the bar. I’ll usually throw out some basic question like “are you still waiting for your drink” and use that to kick something off. Move off from the bar if things are moving nicely.

Regardless, you’re going to want a constant cycle of ins and outs. Posted at the bar and using the natural flow of the spot to bring you new folks to chat up is a money move.

Three Keys

Have had the chance to put in a bunch of reps in new places lately and that always means trying out some new this and that.

After running in to some older stuff by a Dallas cat and adopting a bit of the framework it’s boiled down to running through this mostly in order…

– No judgement
– Sex
– Keeping secrets

Sometimes these things switch up but it’s all mostly related. I’m messing around with whether stories or just straight talking is better for framing these but playing it by ear has been straight venom.

This has also lead to heavy opening up during the postgame show.

The thing is that these can be put on basically any convo topic which is just mostly making some association and tying it back to a relevant experience.

It’s also not something that can come out your neck either. Incongruity would be deadly on it, going against the principles of the whole thing.

It’s been turning up results to say the least.

They really seem to need it because the response very solid and has more or less expressed the sentiment of a very desired release.

A quick illustration of the point.

Rolling out after a solid day of wheeling and dealing. Of course some stuff had closed and I was on the road so there was a celebration to be had. I’m in good spirits.

Head to a spot I’ve posted at before but it’s the middle of the week so it’s a coin toss as to what the energy will be. Roll up and it’s a low key night. People, but not packed and perfect for the plans I had.

Post at the bar with some Rye and start talking out the side of my mouth like always. There’s some good banter with the group next to me, they are fun and interested in where I’m from. I mingle and enjoy the conversation.

I catch eyes with a fly chick as she comes in. The feeling is mutual attraction. I keep up the conversation and a few minutes later she is at the bar ordering a drink.

I ask her how the night is going.

Turns out she’s there with friends. Her roommate is taking a girl home for the night. No Judgement.

She explains she’s not really in to that. Maybe it just wasn’t the right one for her. I get it. I’m in to sex with women. Particularly fly ones like herself that know how to let themselves go when they find something they want.

I asked if it was drama because word got around. Of course it was. Keeping secrets is important.

We order more drinks and the convo goes deeper. Eventually she suggests we head back to my spot after the round.

Say No to Yes Men

Major key to success: saying no to the yes men.

A lot of people that trip up, especially once they get a bit of success, are the ones that surround themselves with people that never challenge them.

So instead of your crew telling you that the new business move you’re thinking of is going to be complete shit, they tell you that it’s a great idea and to throw your money in it.

At the end all y’all looking stupid.

If all you ever got in your circle is a bunch of cats that are gassing you up, no one is doing anyone any favors.

Instead, you want to cultivate reasonable dissent from the people around you.

That way, when you start taking wrong turns, someone will call you out and not just let you fall off.

This is also why you want a girl around that is willing to point out your flaws.

Women are great at this by the way, and a girl that knows you also knows how to stick a knife between your ribs.

That is a blessing.

Moral of the story is to avoid people that are going to blow smoke up your ass because you’re too good for them.

Instead, keep people around that will push you to improve.

Calls

Here’s why I think CALLS are better for these things and also why I use calls on any number I cop and also why I will always tell a girl “I will call you later this week” or text her something like that.

Especially if you’re coping a number from a quick interaction (and I’m thinking this also applies to online but I don’t do that so wouldn’t know) she needs to INVEST in you for her to want to come out.

Otherwise it’s just another number and even if she’s interested if she’s in high demand socially, her friends, work, other dudes, the latest episode off Netflix, and just about anything else is going to be more important than the guy she hasn’t met who is a social UNKNOWN.

So when I do get digits I will tell her to EXPECT a call, which is a bridge from when we first hit off and some future time that builds anticipation.

Then I will CALL her when I have down time. Answering a CALL is a lot more investment on her part than answering a text. It’s an UNDEFINED amount of time, she has to think on her feet, it’s way more emotionally stimulating than a text, etc. etc.

That’s when I will also probe her schedule and figure out when is a good time to put her in my schedule. That can all happen over the phone in about 5 minutes, and I can actually feel her out and figure out where she is in the buying process.

So now that you’ve talked on the phone and actually set a general time she is more invested in meeting up (she spent time on the phone, you were funny and good personality so now she’s curious, you got her schedule and figured out a time that works for her and you, etc.).

For girls that don’t answer, I leave a quick message and tell them to hit me back. Her calling me back is once again an INVESTMENT as she’s got to take time and do all that. A girl that doesn’t bother to CALL you back is the same girl that will text you back and then flake.

Girls that are responsive to CALLS and I can tell are more interested in kicking it get more priority to REWARD their interest. Just like she’s rewarded by an interesting convo when she answers my call.

I also don’t care about getting a girl on the phone a few times before I get her out. If she is busy that week or the times she’s throwing out don’t work for me I will let her know that I’m busy but I will CALL her again later on next week (cue cycle of anticipation and further investment).

Once we’ve got a time set, I will tell her that I will hit her up later to let her know that it is still on.

Another subtle thing is that I don’t put any of the pressure on her to meet up. I find out when she is free, I suggest a time that works, all she has to do is say yes. I’m pacing the whole thing and I take the ground of confirming and setting up a good experience that works with where I will be that day and what I want to do. Then I will let her know later on the day of that I am running late or whatever to confirm that she is still down.

If a girl is super responsive and in to me then I may text her if I’ve got some time to think about it. But if a date is set then I will usually just wait to rap at her IN PERSON and just text to confirm or send her directions.

If I’m just trying to get a girl out, then I will tell her tag along to whatever I’m doing that day. Since that’s just an offer, it’s no big deal if she doesn’t show or has other stuff to do and I don’t get angry if they don’t show.

I just CALL them later and set something up if I want to see her for real.

Mingle

Super helpful social frame that I’ve been running with recently is to roll with an energy and mingle.

Mingling looks something like this.

You roll in to the spot, you say what’s up to the door guys, you give them some dap and make some small talk. You ask them how their night is going. You maybe offer a cig and see whether there are a lot of people coming tonight or if there is an event in the area or whether they have seen the new dancer at 1Oak.

When you’re inside you make sure to chat up anyone who is in your vicinity. You’re not looking to hook anyone, you’re looking to say what’s up and keep it pushing to the next person. If there’s a bit of conversational back and forth then great, but the idea is not to get in to a 10 minute heart to heart. Move on to the next.

Some good ways to run this.

The basic question. Unassuming.

“How is your night going?”

“Do you come here often?”

“Did you get your drinks already?”

Etc.

Situational commentary 

“You’re third wheel tonight”

“They’re getting it on”

Etc.

There’s also some other ones like breaking touch, glass cheers, wave, smile, other action oriented pieces that aren’t full on words to the air type.

A few benefits to this approach:

1. Easy social contact with anyone you want.

Way more straightforward then coming with some roundabout way to open up a clique. If you’re being social with everyone then it’s a straightforward proposition to just add another group to your conversation or to drop another line as you’re passing by.

2. Builds out your energy for the night

Especially early in the night it pays to go around and talk to a bunch of people. It gets the energy up and opens you out to be a more social person. There is something around social momentum that you can use to bounce from one person to another because you’re being quick and light on your feet and doing short-term but valuable interaction.

3. No risk

Something I’ve been playing with a lot more recently but the mingle approach lets you take any motives out the equation and build out any fun that you’re going to have through your more subtle back channel approach.

4. Multipurpose

This works on all kinds of groups. If there’s multiple chicks then you run the same. If there are guys then you run the same. Mostly they will pawn off the social one to you or they will all participate in the conversation. Then you can choose to bounce out of the group or you can apply to the next person in the group to work your way around.

This all around makes it way easier to get in to a social mood and to bring an enjoyable energy to the environment, which is something that you should cultivate. Makes it way more fun for you to hit the streets if you actually enjoy yourself and the people around you are also enjoying themselves.

Get out there.

How to Set Expectations

This is something that I’ve seen again and again with cats that are running in to issues in their interpersonal relationships. There is a single root cause, and it’s really messing stuff up for some people.

Not having expectations is a huge miss when you’re dealing with people, and especially when you’re dealing with girls.

Without expectations, there can’t be the kind of order you need to actually take the lead and run shit.

The good thing is that it’s an easy fix once you realize you’re missing them.

First, figure out very specifically what it is that you want.

Don’t start with some basic general shit, be super specific.

It’s not “I want a girl that is gonna treat me right.” That is basic, and about as far as most cats get in setting their expectations. You can see how that might spiral out of control pretty quickly.

The issue with those kinds of general expectations is that it leaves a lot of room for interpretation. Which means it leaves a lot of room for outcomes other than what you want. Which is not what you want to happen.

So the key when figuring that shit out is to be specific.

Second, you have to communicate your expectations to people. It’s really not enough to have an idea of what you want from someone, you actually have to let them know.

Luckily this isn’t particularly difficult. It can be as easy as saying “I expect…” and then filling in the blank.

It’s crazy how powerful this can be once you start voicing the things that you want out of people. They start rising to the occasion and going out of their way to fit in to the area where you’ve directed them.

The final part here is that you have to use some carrot and stick action to make sure that your expectations are being met.

If the chick is falling short, you have to let her know, which is really just a way of reinforcing your expectation.

Once again this is simple stuff. When people do what you want, you give them a bit of reward. When they don’t you don’t reward them.

It’s really crazy how simple this is. Can’t state that enough.

  1. Figure out your expectations
  2. Communicate them
  3. Enforce them

That’s it.

The issue is that cats are failing on one or many of these steps.

They don’t know what they want, so they have no idea how to communicate that and then they fail at enforcing anything because it’s unclear to all parties.

The remedy is to understand what you want, which means having standards. Communicating what you want, which means being able to articulate those standards. Then enforcing what you want, which means being alright with doling out a bit of reward or punishment when needed.

Work on setting some basic expectations in your life and you’ll be a lot happier for it.

Get out there.

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